Imposter Syndrome
Imposter syndrome is a relatively new term (approximately 1978), it isn’t recognised as a clinical diagnosis by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, fifth edition (DSM-5)
It can be experienced differently and can impact most areas of life, from work to relationships. It’s a sense of being fraudulent, that you might be found out and your success is not deserved. This can increase anxiety, impact on mood and overworking. Many of us might have felt it at least once in our lives and then we let it go. For others it can be a frequent experience. Anyone can experience it.
There are many multiple reasons why someone experiencing imposter syndrome e.g., childhood, life experience, family personality traits and even the current work or relationship environment might be feeling it e.g., job promotion. If you are finding that imposter syndrome is impacting your quality of life then it might be time to speak with your GP or health care professional like a psychologist. You are most welcome to contact me if you would like to discuss attending therapy at our clinic in Newcastle.
Here are some ideas of self-help / psycho educational.
1. Increase awareness of self-criticism
Do you find your mood impacts on your self-criticism?
Are there days when your mood is rather ‘good’ and your inner critic is less?
Are there certain areas in your life that you criticise yourself more?
We can all experience doubt and self-criticism from time to time. However, if we are living life constantly by criticising our self it might be time to start changing it. Inner dialogues such as “I am not good at this work” leads to a self-fulfilling belief, impacts on our mood and behaviour. Taking a deep breath, hand on heart and saying “I am good enough” can be the start of challenging this inner dialogue. Give a name to your inner bully and every time you hear your inner bully start say “stop”. Criticism to self or even others does not empower, it’s disempowering…positive inner chat does!
2. Positive affirmations
This can work wonders for many. “I can do this”, “there is no such thing as mistakes, learning experiences”, “I am human”. Someone experiencing imposter syndrome at work tends to work more to make themselves feel better (it doesn’t work), a positive affirmation such as “I give myself rest, I do not need to check my emails” can be important to support emotional well-being. I recommend writing affirmations down so it’s something you can visually see every day. Set yourself a reminder to read them.
3. Review your success
We’ve spoke in section one about the inner bully. It might sound like a cliche but being our own best friend is an important aspect for our emotional well-being. This is a form of self-compassion and can nurture ourselves in validating our feelings. Viewing our self as a best friend can help us see our successes. Journal positive aspects about your day, what you’ve done well. Our habit of thinking negatively about our self requires to be challenged. Then start thinking of how much you invested to be the person you are, this could be study, playing with your children and what you bring to a relationship. This can be difficult when you start journaling to look inwardly with warmth and affection. Take your time seeing all of you. This is helpful to challenge “I got lucky” or “they gave me the job because I was the only one who replied”.
4. Practicing Self-compassion
In section 3, self-compassion was briefly introduced. This is different from our inner critic. Self-compassion is responding to ourselves with kindness, no name calling and softness.
Imposter syndrome can be linked to esteem & unworthiness therefore responding with self-compassion can be difficult for many but with time and practice it can become a new habit.
At times we have to make peace with our past. This doesn’t mean forgetting it simply means accepting life choices we’ve previously made and bringing attention to the here and now, how we can live moving forward. Please remember it’s okay to not be able to do all this alone. We humans need the right support when healing.
Start treating yourself as if you are your own best friend. How would you talk to your best friend? How would you treat them? I’m sure you’d recommend rest, enabling them to value all that they are and allowing them space to feel the wide range of emotions and gently challenging their perspective. Not all of our thoughts are based on fact. We create stories in our mind about how others think or feel about us, this is not usually based on evidence.
Kind reminder, healing and change is a journey and there is no quick fix.
Dr Ash
Chartered Psychologist